October 17, 2024 Craic & Codology

IN HIS sternest warning yet, Michael Twee Higgins has accused Israel of making “outrageous” threats against Irish peace-keeping troops in Lebanon. Using suitably undiplomatic language, President Higgins fired off his latest ultimatum, warning that if the Israeli government ignores him there might well be serious consequences. Benjamin Netanyahu was visibly shaken by the ferocious onslaught… Read more »

October 17, 2024 Craic & Codology

Exclusive by all pol corrs The endless speculation about the date of the next election will continue at least until November, it has been revealed. With interest in the possible date at fever pitch around the globe, all Irish newspapers will continue to fill up space with more guesses about when the election will take… Read more »

October 17, 2024 Craic & Codology

Complaints: Public think Darragh O’Brien’s development policies are objectionable Submission: Politicians to keep pandering to nimbys in their constituencies Rights of way: Government always giving everyone the runaround on homeless figures Appeals: Coalition TDs will shortly start begging for votes in a general election Traffic management: Cabinet will park all those social housing targets when… Read more »

October 17, 2024 Craic & Codology

There is growing unease in Saudi Arabia after the country’s Public Investment Fund recently bought a 40% share of Brown Thomas and Arnotts’ owner, Selfridges. Saudi citizens are now concerned they will have to attend Leinster rugby matches, send their kids to Clongowes and take out an Irish Times subscription. “Look goys, it’s really not… Read more »

October 17, 2024 Craic & Codology

Transport minister Eamon Ryan has said that it is more important than ever that a cap is imposed on the number of interviews Michael O’Leary is allowed to give. “The amount of time that man spends polluting the airwaves is disgraceful,” said a frustrated Ryan. “Drastic steps must be taken to reduce his noxious emissions.”

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

Child Benefit Increase Every child to benefit, eventually, from hundreds of millions being handed to BAM for the National Children’s Hospital. Inheritance Tax Raised Next government to inherit an even more taxing fiasco with housing. Winter Heating Allowance Plenty more stories of costly Leinster House improvements to keep people hot under the collar. Public Transport… Read more »

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

In what is being seen as a major diplomatic coup, Simon Harris is set to make a highly publicised visit to the Taoiseach’s office. The trip will mark a major change from Harris’s usual schedule, which is normally crammed with photo ops with the likes of Keir Starmer, Joe Biden and Wednesday director Tim Burton,… Read more »

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

JUSTICE MINISTER Helen McEntee has defended the Government’s decision to drop the hate speech elements from proposed legislation. According to the frazzled minister: “This is an extremely sensitive issue that divides TDs. But it is clearly now time for strong decisive action, so I am therefore shelving it indefinitely.” Taoiseach Simon Harris immediately took to… Read more »

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

♦ Black hole in the finances ♦ Steam coming out of the public’s ears ♦ Walls of silence around opening date ♦ Roof caving in on Stephen Donnelly ♦ Cracks appearing in the coalition ♦ Simon Harris no longer fireproof ♦ Board skirting hard questions

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

The Letter I will arise now and go everywhere I can To explain about the letter that I posted to Iran. For a new president they have there, and just to show I care, I said ‘fair play’ to the lad with the beard and grey hair. And now I have no peace here, no… Read more »

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

Following on from the €336,000 bike shed and €1.4m security hut, news that a structure in Government buildings was completed for a reasonable price has been called “ridiculous” by Government ministers, who said they were shocked to hear of the modest figure. “Unfortunately, we were unable to complete the project for a higher price,” said… Read more »

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

My Life as a Filthy Rich Libel Lawyer Honestly, I rarely think about being Hollywood’s most powerful man. It just goes with the whole celebrity lawyer territory as confidante to the most visible and sometimes most vulnerable stars on earth. Prince Andrew, Tom Cruise, Britney, Johnny Depp… They all have such deep, deep respect for… Read more »

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

Irish Rail will be called before the Oireachtas transport committee after a train reached its destination on time. The development has caused huge frustration amongst commuters, who have become used to delayed services and overcrowded carriages following a recent timetable revision. “The timely arrival was unfortunately caused by an unexpected lack of technical and fault… Read more »

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

By Enda Tyme There was growing anger yet again across Ireland yesterday as contractors BAM indicated that the anticipated date for the next announcement of a further delay in completing the National Children’s Hospital would be delayed. “Unfortunately, due to circumstances totally beyond our control, we won’t be ready on schedule to announce the next… Read more »

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

THERE WAS widespread shock yesterday after it emerged that Simeon Burke had not interrupted any court proceedings, been involved in protests outside the Law Library or generally acted the maggot. Instead, the aspiring top barrister joined his family in Co Mayo where he relaxed and perused The Bible, looking for inspiration. Simeon then wrote to… Read more »

October 3, 2024 Craic & Codology

I’ve never shied away from the physical side of the game and there’s no doubt my body has taken its fair share of hits over the years. However, one thing which always mystified me was the utterly false accusation that there’s a problem with my windpipe. Throughout my playing career I was regularly accused by… Read more »